i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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