What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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