Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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