and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize