I must be too annoying 4 u.
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
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