Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize