I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
