nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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