I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
