I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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