Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
