idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
