her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Success! We fucked roommates!
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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