Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Sorry about my life...
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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