She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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