I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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