apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
She's the barista slut.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
