i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
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