where does the pee come out of this thing
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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