was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
