Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
