when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
He kissed a someone with a penis
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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