she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
it's great music for shaving your balls
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
