I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
