I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
