i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
