Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
