i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
