I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
The adults are the big ones right?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
