absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
