Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
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