I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
well you can't waste a boner
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
