I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
babies were throwing up all over the place
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
