I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
