yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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