Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
