But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
