I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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