YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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