They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
