I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize