I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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