So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
