True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize