we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
