I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
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