My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Randomize
