It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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