Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Your penis caused this!
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
