just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
dude. I can hear the air.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
